Q & A ~ Part 2

While I’m on a roll…

Q

Karen asks: I am wanting to make the leap from Jump Math (Canadian) to TT. I don't like math and my little guy who is in grade three but just finished his grade 5 math book is now in math that is stumping me(or at least taking waay to much time to figure out)
When I did research on TT I have read it is behind and that the kids don't test well in higher grades so TT doesn't prepare them. I have always respected your reviews and choices-thoughts??

A

I’ve heard the same thing. I don’t have long-term experience with Teaching Textbooks (we’re on our third year, finishing up level 5), so it’s hard for me to speak to that. But I am also not sure what my reasonable choices are. My oldest son struggles with math, and I don’t know that a rigorous conceptual math program would be beneficial for him. And I’m not sure that a teacher-intensive math program would work well for us, either, for a couple reasons. What I do know is that he is right on grade level with TT Math and he is managing to meet state standards on testing so far (for the past 3 years). I do have my younger sons work ahead according to their ability. I also supplement with more conceptual math books and programs such as Beast Academy, Critical Thinking Co. math workbooks such as Balance Math, and the out-of-the box Life of Fred books. I may consider Art of Problem Solving for Luke and Leif when they hit middle school. I’ll be sharing a little more about our math approach in the next installment of my curricula series.

Q

Facebook has been an interesting place lately, and I’ve been enjoying several different discussions. Friends often comment on my blog posts on FB rather than here, and I forget that not everyone can see those conversations! A friend of mine asked this question in response to my Q&A and another link I posted over there regarding personality styles: I've been reading and reading (still) Penelope Trunk's blog...what do you think of what she has to say about homeschooling? And then I ended up posting a ridiculously long answer. Since I already went to all the work of typing out my thoughts, it made sense to share them here as well in case anyone is interested. I’d love to hear various opinions in the comments.

A

Okay, I had to re-read a few of her posts because it had been a while. I DO agree with her on many points, and I find her blog refreshingly unapologetic. I think what I take exception to is her overall black and white approach and the general tone of harshness and negativity. I’m more of a peacemaker personality, and I think homeschooling vs private school vs public school can easily become a point of pride, divisiveness, or even alienation—an ‘us against them mentality.’ Do I think homeschooling is ideal? Yep. Do I think all homeschoolers homeschool well? Nope. Do I think homeschooling is the best case in all scenarios? Nope. I also am not dogmatic about homeschooling for religious reasons even though our faith greatly informs the lens through which we view life, information, and ideas (though I may seem more dogmatic about homeschooling if I am encountering the point of view that Christians are obligated to have their children in public school as a witness/ministry to other non-Christians—I have pretty strong opinions in that case).

Consider her post comparing homeschooling to breast feeding. She thinks that breast feeding is the best option in all cases, no matter the sacrifice. I think it is ideal, but nowhere near the “only way.” When the mom’s physical heath or mental health is at a significant risk? Nope. When the baby is not thriving? Nope. When the mom’s milk supply is inadequate or compromised? Nope. When the family is greatly subsisting due to financial issues? Nope. And is it possible for an adopted child to *thrive* when breast feeding is an impossibility? Yep. I do think there needs to be positive education about the benefits of breastfeeding, but I don’t think we need to vilify and condemn mothers who use formula (and I think that about many baby/child-raising issues—it’s okay to feel strongly about them, but don’t die on that hill).

Can some kids thrive on the freedom outside of school even in cases of neglect or abuse (which was her childhood situation)? Yes. Can all children? A resounding no. Could public school be something akin to saving grace for a child whose home life is destructive? Yes. (She doesn’t seem to think so. For what it’s worth, my husband experienced both of the above scenarios.) Are some kids bored out of their skull in school? Yes. Are some kids appropriately challenged by caring adults? Absolutely. Do some personalities struggle with the way our educational system is structured? Yes. But do some kids thrive in that environment? Yes. I just don’t think it is as clear-cut as she makes it out to be. There are some good schools. There are many incredible teachers.

I absolutely agree that it is worth personal sacrifice to homeschool. But if parents aren’t passionate about their children’s education regardless of what their vision of education might be, many kids are going to flounder. I don’t think parents should homeschool out of fear. Or an overwhelming sense of obligation. They also shouldn’t sacrifice the stability of their family, a marriage, a parent-child relationship, or the mental/emotional/physical health of the mother (to a large degree) on the altar of homeschooling.

Other things that bother me are the hyper-focus on the corporate world (which is her world, the point of her blog, and not one that I can relate to in any way), the idea that all kids should specialize early, and overall view that education and specialization are all about leverage in the work force. I guess I’ve come to the opinion that education is more about cultural literacy, who we are as human beings made in the image of God, and becoming people who are informed and can think critically about the wide world around us. I think education is less about what we get and more about who we become. I may be mis-reading her due to my emotional response (which sets us apart anyway—she is very calculating, I am very emotional).

This quote (which I posted recently) highlights what I feel is the essence of education (though obviously not in the negative):

"What they learn, however, is not the value of thinking, the importance of individuality, the mysteries of nature, the secrets of science, the themes of human existence, the lessons of history, the logic of mathematics, the essence of tragedy. Nor do they learn about what is distinctly human, how to become humane, why we have laws, or what it means to be noble." (From Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Canadian doctors Neufeld and Maté.)

I also LOVE this article, Labor, Leisure, and Liberal Education by Mortimer Adler, on the distinction between viewing education in the context of labor and viewing it in the context of leisure. (The whole article is long but worth reading.)

“Thus, for example, there can be two reasons for learning carpentry. One might wish to learn carpentry simply to acquire the skill or art of using tools to fabricate things out of wood, an art or skill that anyone is better for having. Or one might wish to learn carpentry in order to make good tables and chairs, not as works of art which reflect the excellence of the artist, but as commodities to sell. This distinction between the two reasons for learning carpentry is connected in my mind with the difference or distinction between liberal and vocational education. This carpentry is the same in both cases, but the first reason for learning carpentry is liberal, the second vocational.

”All of this, I think, leads directly to the heart of the matter: that vocational training is training for work or labor; it is specialized rather than general; it is for an extrinsic end; and ultimately it is the education of slaves or workers. And from my point of view it makes no difference whether you say slaves or workers, for you mean that the worker is a man who does nothing but work—a state of affairs which has obtained by the way, during the whole industrial period, from its beginning almost to our day.”

I really do agree with her more than it may seem. But her mission (and strength) is to be bold, shocking even, and speak without reservation. I'd like to think my mission (and strength) is to inspire and encourage (however feebly I may succeed). We need all sorts of people to make this world go around. [smile]

Questions and Answers

 

Again, I want to tell you all how much I appreciated your lovely comments on my anniversary post. They meant a great deal to me! I want to give honorable mention to Kim’s poem, which put a huge smile on my face. Seriously, I have fantabulous readers who compose nice poems about Mt. Hope Chronicles. Am I blessed, or what?!

A Rhyme for Heidi:
You're my top resource
for homeschool ideas... and books of course!
Your online curriculum discourse
I heartily endorse.
So I'll say till I'm hoarse
"Make Mt. Hope Chronicles your source!"
Said with force,
Kim
Visiting your blog almost daily for 4 years

Several readers had questions that I want to address, as well. I’ll do my best to answer them! 

Q

Katie said: “I really really want to learn how to diagram a sentence!”

(Okay, that isn’t really a question, but I can’t resist a sentence diagramming plea!)

A

I think I’ll have to start a new sentence diagramming series on my blog, because I want to share the joy! But maybe this will help you get started. (I added a more complicated diagram at the bottom in case anyone needs something more challenging. A prepositional phrase can be either adjectival or adverbial, so place the preposition diagonally below the word it modifies. Interjections and nouns of direct address float on a line above the subject.):

 

Q

Erica asked: “Are there required reading books for your boys? Do they absolutely have to read a certain number or certain titles? Do you have any kind of incentive program for them to read difficult books? Or, can they just choose whatever is available of the general subject matter?”

A

I’m not sure how to answer that one, honestly. I do have a few books I would require for the two older boys, but it has never really come down to an “I know you don’t want to read this book, but you must” sort of thing because they generally read whatever I give them. Some of the major history-based literature would be at the top of the list (such as retellings of the Iliad and Odyssey). But I work hard to find appealing versions, and often several different versions of the important books. If they struggled with any particular title that I considered a “must read,” I would try reading it aloud (which, I confess, is not something I get around to nearly often enough) or getting an audio version. I’d have no trouble requiring them to listen (while playing quietly) whether or not they enjoy the book.

Most often, I have a feast of books spread on a large ottoman in our front room at any given time. The books include current selections from various subjects such as science, math, history, geography, and literature. The boys usually pick up books on their own, but sometimes I’ll hand them one and say “read this.” I go through the books every week or so and ask the boys what they’ve read and what they haven’t. They catch up on the books they’ve missed, and then I refresh the stacks. Sounds super organized, right? (Not.)

To be clear, I definitely have different expectations for each of the boys. I don’t expect Luke to read the more difficult chapter books (but I may encourage it—he is more likely to comply if I only suggest one chapter at a time). Leif pretty much reads whatever he wants, and skips what doesn’t interest him (though I should be expecting more from him). I figure that they read so much in general that it is unreasonable for me to expect them to finish a book that they truly dislike or simply can’t get into, especially for Levi who will read almost anything. I’d feel differently if I had a child who turned up his nose at many of the books I selected or struggled with confidence.

Incentive programs aren’t really our thing simply because it takes too much to keep track of them. Ha! I do think that the two younger boys are motivated by incentives (especially my middle son), and I wouldn’t be against them if we needed a little nudge at some point. Leif in particular is stubborn about reading new books (he re-reads familiar titles or series). I find that requiring him to read a couple pages aloud to me works well. He enjoys the one-on-one time with me, and it helps him get into a new book. I also know parents who read aloud just until a book gets exciting and then leave it lying about to tempt reluctant readers.

I’m not sure that helps much, because I understand I’m in a different position from many parents. My main approach is to spread a large feast of captivating quality books along a wide range of subjects (though usually integrated with our current studies) and not worry about it too much as long as they are reading.

Q

Jaime asked: i've always wondered what russ does for a living. you might've told us, but i forget. what do you love most about your life? what is your favorite strength? you least favorite weakness?

A

When my husband and I first got together (almost eighteen years ago!), he was a teacher and a swim coach/pool director. He was teaching at an alternative school when we got married, and it was miserable. Then he taught one year of middle school math and science, and it was even more miserable (which I didn’t think possible). He changed careers and went to school for computer networking. It was a great choice for him (although technology can often be as testy as a hormonal adolescent).

Currently he is a computer systems engineer. He conducts technical demonstrations for mobile and end-point (desktops, laptops, and servers) management software. (Do you understand that? I don’t, which is why I don’t talk about his job much. Ha!!) The company he works for specializes in antivirus and client management software. He commutes to a near-by city three days a week and works from home two days. He occasionally has week-long business trips out of state.

Over the years, he has also done a large amount of independent consulting for all sorts of businesses (trucking companies, dentists, furniture stores, charter schools, fast food restaurants, lawyers, retirement homes, meat distributors, you-name-it). Whatever they need done, if it has something to do with technology, he does it. He also comes to the rescue of countless private individuals. He could work 24 hours a day and still never run out of computer projects.

And, he helps coach for the boys’ swim club a few afternoons a week (year-round). He swims during the first hour while Levi is swimming and then coaches during the second hour while Luke is swimming. Right now Leif is taking swim lessons during the first hour two days a week as well, so swimming is a big father-son activity.

So he burns the candle at both ends, works weekends, and spends all spare moments with the kids (he often takes them when he is running errands or even when visiting personal consulting clients, and they love to watch shows together like Mythbusters, How It’s Made, and How Things Work). He loves to read when he gets a chance. He likes science fiction. He fixes everything—if he doesn’t know how, he researches online and then digs in. He replaces the brakes on the cars, tackles transmissions, tears apart the washing machine to find out what’s wrong…nothing intimidates him. He is a non-sequential, non-traditional, really smart, hard-working, out-of-the-box sort of guy.

Ohmygoodness, I’m only on question #2 out of 4. I’d better speed this up. What I love most about my life? Family. Absolutely. I love my husband and kids. I love having the most awesome extended family on the planet—and living close to them. My parents. My sisters and brothers-in-law. My nieces and nephew. I love our spontaneous get-togethers and our traditional holidays. My husband has a little different background, but he has parents that sort of adopted him when he was in high school. They live close by and are some of my favorite people. They are wonderfully supportive of us and treat us so well. I love spending time with them! My best friend of more than twenty years (who married Russ’s best friend) lives just down the road, has two kids the same ages as my oldest two, and we do a bunch together. They are like family. Beyond that, I have a really fantastic community of friends. The two major (and overlapping) close communities are my book club (which I started with some long-time family friends and we have been going for nine years!!) and Classical Conversations (which includes family, close friends, and really special new friends). I am so blessed!

My attempt at speeding this up didn’t work. Let’s try again. What is my favorite strength? That is so much harder to answer than weakness, but I would say my favorite strength is that I am kind. And loyal. And dependable. My least favorite weakness is much easier to answer. I HATE that I struggle so much with self-discipline because it causes problems in every area of my life!! I also hate that I have a tendency to interrupt people when talking one-on-one or in small groups where I’m comfortable. I talk about myself waaaay too much. I also wish I were more adventurous and willing to get outside my comfort zone more often.

Q

Jessica Stock asked: I have a question I wonder if you could blog about sometime: first, how/when do you prepare the materials you will need for each week? Do you know ahead of time what books you want to use, or do you pick them off the shelf at the library? Do you take the kids along when you go to the library? And then, how/ where do you keep your materials so they are available? I am only homeschooling one first grader and I can't imagine when we get to three how I will keep track of all of the books, cds, papers, etc!

A

Well, this is one area that is a struggle for me. I am great at planning the bigger-picture details, but not at weekly planning and prep. Luckily, most of our curricula is either open-and-go or snuggle-on-the-couch-and-read-together style. I do look ahead in our history book and pick corresponding books off of our shelf or put books on hold at the library. This isn’t a formal process, though, and it’s one I enjoy. I do try to get some specific books from Amazon or the library, but I also just grab what is available on a subject. When something catches my eye at the library (I always scan the new books), I grab it—even if it isn’t exactly what I had planned or is on a topic we aren’t studying. I prefer to search the library online and put books on hold when I’m looking for something specific. I usually have the kids with me, so it is much easier to take a stack of books off of the hold shelf and then quickly scan the new books display. Library visits aren’t very productive when Lola is along.

Right now we haven’t been working down in our studio as much (my husband has been working from home and is using the space), so I keep most of our work handy in our main living space. I have a crate behind the couch that holds most of our main curricula. The books I want the boys to choose from for independent reading are stacked on a large ottoman by the couch. I have a bookshelf under the bar in our kitchen with bins of school supplies. Another crate holds our books for CC Essentials so that it can be transported back and forth. BUT, I am still drowning in piles of books and paper mess everywhere. Dealing with that, and coming up with systems, is one of my main goals for the next couple weeks. I’ll let you know how it goes!

I’d like to say that my approach to weekly or daily planning, organization, and implementation is very organic in style, but the reality is that I’m just lazy.

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I just re-read my answers and I rambled all over the place. I wish I had magical systems of planning and organizing (or getting children to read) to share with you, but I don’t.

 

Does anyone have any other questions or curiosities? Maybe I’ll do a video interview next time to push myself out of my comfort zone. GASP!

Mt. Hope Academy Open House ~ Preliminary Planning

I’m hoping to schedule an open house for local friends and readers within the next month or so. We could chat homeschooling and possibly have everyone bring their favorite curricula or resources to share. I’m curious to find out whether there is any interest and what day of the week or time of day might be preferable. This is your chance for input! Let me know what you would like to see or do, and when!

April 4th is currently my tentative date. Help me plan this thing! [grin]

And the Winner Is…

I did one of those Random Number Generator things, but I’m not smart enough to figure out how to post a picture of it on my blog (which is one of many reasons why I still have this simple personal blog and not a high-profile blog, ha!). I came up with number 17, and if I counted correctly, the winner is Susan!

“I just went to my old blog at homeschool blogger. I couldn't remember when I started blogging. October 2005. Over 7 years. My kids were 4, 7 and 8. Wow! they are now 11, 14, 15. Pre, 2nd and 3rd grade to 5th, 8th and 10th. I'm just floored thinking about it. Lets see how long ago did you take my photos. I think I found Poets Garden first and then learned about Mt Hope from your mom. All in the same year or pretty close. Nope-I went to poets garden with a friend for my birthday one year (may) and then the following may you took my photos. I just don't know what year that was. I still have a 16x20 bw of me in the trees in my room. Let me know if you remember.”

Susan, I searched my blog, and we did your pictures four years ago, waaaay back in May of 2009. We’ve both come a long way since then, haven’t we? (And how is it that we haven’t gotten together since then?!)

I loved Susan’s family blog, From the Narrows. One of my favorite blog posts of hers was Little House—River Crossing. I remember reminiscing about my own childhood with two sisters (and a log cabin playhouse made by my dad!) and being a little wistful that I didn’t have girls to wear prairie dresses. [grin] Susan’s current blog, Lily Fields, showcases her gorgeous photography.

Readers, friends, your kind comments have been read and re-read. I started this blog for my own record, but knowing that I can encourage or inspire others has kept me going these six years. Your sweet words have brightened my gray February. Thank you so much!!

I’m amazed at how many of you have been reading for years. The pre-Lola and post-Lola divide cracked me up. But I realized that I found out I was pregnant with her at the three year mark—exactly half-way through this blogging adventure.

Thank you, again, for being part of the lovely at Mt. Hope Chronicles!!

Here’s to another six years and more!

Do you know what today is? (Don’t miss this post!)

 

SIX YEARS.

One thousand, six hundred, forty-one blog posts.

Gasp!! Can that be possible?

Who knew I had that much to say (other than my mom and my sisters and my best friend…)?

I didn’t realize when I started this journey that it would take on a life of its own. I’m glad that I made the decision to keep this a personal blog, but that also means that my topics are all over the place. And sometimes I post a bunch about one thing, and then the blog seems to shift as my life does as well. And sometimes I talk even when I have nothing to say.

I’m thankful for this record of the past six years of my life that I would never have kept otherwise.

I’m thankful for readers. And comments. I’m thankful for the things you have shared and taught me.

I’m thankful for the many friendships I have gained.

We really must celebrate.

The only way to celebrate here at Mt. Hope Chronicles is with chocolate chips cookies, sentence diagramming, or books. I already shared chocolate chip cookies for Valentine’s Day, and I’m guessing sentence diagramming doesn’t sound like much of a party to most of you, so books it is.

That’s right. An Amazon gift certificate give-away.


(And you can even get something other than books. Just don’t tell me.)


In a way, I’m just giving back a little portion of what you have given me. Because y’all have been awesome about purchasing books through my Amazon links the past few months. I’m a bit stunned at the response to my recommendations. (It terrifies me just a little.) Did you know that I get credit for all the other items you put in your cart when you go to Amazon through one of my links? So thank you to the fantabulous readers who buy mattress toppers, Oakley sunglasses, golf equipment, Kitchenaid stand mixers, Lego Ninjago sets, almond flour, and all sorts of other interesting things after hitting Amazon through my links. Seriously! Your purchases really make a difference. (Just in case you were wondering, I cannot see who purchased items, just what items were purchased!)

Here’s the deal. I’m giving away one $50 Amazon gift certificate to a lucky winner.

To enter the give-away, leave me a comment on this post letting me know how long you’ve been visiting and what you most enjoy reading about here at Mt. Hope. If you would like, you may even ask your burning questions or make requests for new post topics.

Make sure I have a way to contact you!

The give-away ends on Saturday, February 23rd at midnight, Pacific time. I’ll announce the winner on Tuesday the 26th.

The give-away is now closed. I’ll announce the winner on Tuesday the 26th.

Thanks for all of the kind words, friends and readers. They have meant so much to me!!

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In the beginning, February of 2007, I had a very basic Blogger template. I can’t seem to find the image I added to my header about a year later in 2008 (sadness!), but I thought it would be fun to stroll down memory lane with a few more recent headers. I think the above collage was my first photo header in 2009.

Spring 2010:


November 2010:


Spring 2011 (My favorite!):


December 2011:


I know it is about time to update my current header, but I’m waiting for some super-duper inspirational pictures to choose from, and that just isn’t happening in February at our house.

Where will we be in another six years?

My boys will be 17, 14, and 12!! Lola will be 8! I will have been married 23 years and homeschooling for 13. Golly! I can’t even imagine what life will look like.

Will you join me for the adventure?

ETA:
I'm not sure if this will work as I am away from home and not working from my home computer, but a fabulous reader sent me a link to my archived blog with my first custom header. Let's see if I can get it posted here:

Favorite Posts of 2012 ~ A Year in Review

Blogging is, for me, a multi-faceted, interactive journal. A journal that would never happen otherwise.

Looking over the past (almost) six years of entries, I am astounded. Astounded by how far we’ve come. Astounded by how much we’ve grown. Astounded by the friendships I’ve made. Astounded by the books we’ve read.

The thoughts, the hopes, the experiences. The low moments, and the highs.

I recently reviewed this past year and picked out my favorite posts as I went along. I’m sharing them today in the hopes that you’ll (re)enjoy them, too.

Education:

In general, my monthly education reports are my favorites. Many days it felt as if we weren’t making progress, but keeping track of our book lists and lessons completed made me realize that putting one foot in front of the other each day truly works. I also loved collecting the quotes and links for inspiration and thought-provoking ideas.

Notes from one of my favorite Book Detectives meetings

Memory Master (I did it!)

I poured a lot of time and effort into this post detailing our experience with Classical Conversations.

Mt. Hope Academy ~ The Great Conversation (the first post in a homeschooling series that will be continued this month)

Reading:

18 Essential Books for 18 Years of Childhood

Living Life:

A Day in the Life~ Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4 (Was that really a year ago?!)

Snow and Flood

A tour of our house

Thoughts on Life:

On being real

The difference between lovely and reality

Billboards (one of my most-viewed posts of the year)

Lola’s World:

The Many Faces of Lola (20 months)

Lola @ One (a fun collage from her year as a one year old)

Photo Sessions:

My fabulous four

Stephanie’s maternity session

Stephanie’s family session

Danielle’s family session

Shannon’s maternity session

Welcoming Rilla Grey

Adventure:

It’s no surprise that my trip to see Susan Wise Bauer in Virginia, as well as getting to know some fabulous women and hanging out with Tsh Oxenreider, was a high point of my year: Day 1, Day 2~The B&B, Day 2~Touring, Day 3, and Day 4.

Sand In Our Toes

California road trip to see my Grandparents (I had bunches of posts with pictures, but the important thing is that we spend time with my grandparents!)

Air

The first day of school

The Renaissance Faire

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I had a hard time narrowing it down to that long list! I’m surprised by how many lovely moments we had this year—which is the point of this blog. To remember. To speak gratitude.

And now I’m looking forward to a fresh year. A year full of wonderful possibility.

Have you chosen your One Little Word for the year? I hadn’t even been thinking of it when someone else mentioned it. My first reaction was that I had no idea how to go about picking a word. Then it popped into my head and I haven’t been able to get rid of it.

Onward.

Yes, one foot in front of the other and before we know it, we are on a journey. Who knows where it will take us.

Today’s the Day!

More Confessions

(What is it about the holiday season that can induce so many feelings of guilt and inadequacy?)

1. I am a terrible gift-giver.

I want to give gifts that are perfect, treasured, surprising, purchased locally (or handmade), and either shockingly inexpensive or sacrificially expensive—gifts that tell the recipients: I know you, and you are loved. That isn’t asking too much, is it?

Now, for some people (I personally know a few) this is their gift. (Pun intended.) They scout and hunt and cross rivers and mountains for months to come up with that precious, perfect, surprising thing. Or they whip up some creative magic and voila!

I am not that person.

2. I don’t shop locally.

Actually, I don’t shop much at all. And when I do shop, I usually have four kids in tow. Three boys and a toddler. Yeah, we don’t go into pretty shops much.

I think this one induces the most guilt. After all, I used to co-own a local shop that depended on the loyalty of customers willing to make the effort instead of buying at Target or online. And willing to pay a little more for atmosphere.

Guess where I shop?

Costco. Target. Old Navy. Amazon.

Yep. That’s it. Oh, and the grocery store when I can’t find what I need at Costco (or if I don’t want the mega-size they offer).

3. I don’t think toys are magical.

Are you one of those parents who gets as excited about toys as your children, who are overjoyed to receive them? In the past year, two of my friends went to the effort to purchase gifts for my children for the sole purpose of fulfilling my children’s dreams. They are the type of people who are able to see things with the eyes of a child.

I buy books.

Maybe it is because I’ve been at this parenting gig long enough to see toy after toy abandoned within days (sometimes hours) and piled up in a room with no space. Or games pulled out and pieces scattered without the game ever being played. When the budget is small, the house is small, and the child’s interest (in playing or cleaning up) is small, why buy toys?

Do your kids play with toys? My boys aren’t big toy-players. Our family must be an anomaly because my boys don’t even like Legos. They do enjoy Playmobil, so that is one collection that we keep handy in a big bin. They also have gotten a lot of use out of the tunics and cloaks my mom made them for Christmas last year, so we have a second bin for dress-up/costume stuff. Other than that, most of their toys are in the attic.

So how do I approach Christmas shopping?

Amazon Prime is a lifesaver. It takes the stress out of Christmas gifts. I can “shop” in snatches of time for a huge variety of items. I can view wish lists. I can create wish lists. I can make small orders here and there. I can order the week before Christmas. I don’t pay shipping.

My extended family creates Amazon wish lists and we draw names among the adults.

We don’t spend a lot on Christmas gifts, especially toys.

I purchase gifts for the people on my list, and I’m thrilled if a couple are “it” gifts. I have a couple “it” gifts this year. That makes me happy.

My boys are all getting books. Luckily they love books. (If only they could savor them just a bit longer!) We are getting the Oliver Twist (Radio Theatre) production as a family gift, as well.

One of the gifts I’m excited about is a book/toy combination. I’ve purchased The Littlest Matryoshka for Lola and got Matryoshka Nesting Dolls to go with the book. Honestly, I think even the boys are going to enjoy sharing these with her. They are just plastic nesting dolls, but I really think she’ll love putting them together and taking them apart. (I thought about getting these Mini Owl Matryoshkas, but I think we’ll wait and see if she enjoys the first set.)

The gift that could go either way (a hit or a disaster) is the 8 Note Hand Bells set I purchased for the kids. We’ve watched a couple hand bell choirs lately, and it is quite the fascinating experience. I had the opportunity to play in one years ago. This could be a great family project that fosters unity and harmony…or serious discord. I’ll try not to set my expectations too high. {wry grin} I also purchased the book of Hymns for 8 Note Bells (with CD). We’ll see how it goes.

(Don’t feel too sorry for my boys, toy-lovers. I know they will be getting some fun things from the grandparents.)

 

Do you enjoy Christmas shopping?

 

Do you have any gifts you are particularly excited to give this year?

Confession

Everyone is posting pictures of their decorated Christmas trees on facebook this evening.

But I have a confession.

I have no desire to get a Christmas tree.

No desire to decorate my house for Christmas.

No desire to do a single craft.

Nope.

If I add one more thing, one more mess to this space I will go insane.

That is all.

I’ll resume my more cheerful attitude in the morning. I promise.

Taking a Breath (of Fresh Air)

The past week has been crazy busy, and I’m finally getting a day to breathe (and begin to dig my way out of the avalanche of mess I’m buried in). The boys had a change in schedule for their swim practices, and I’ve had a rough time adjusting. Wednesday was Russ’s birthday. Leif’s tutor invited us all over Thursday for a nature hike/hot chocolate party so the kids could start on their nature journals. Friday and Saturday were completely consumed by a huge baby shower I threw for my sister with a tremendous amount of help from an awesome crew of friends and family. (Pictures to come, of course.)

My mom was gone for a couple weeks spending time with my grandma who began chemo treatments for cancer (just as grandpa was beginning to feel better). I was glad my mom was able to make the trip, but I sure did miss her! I realized just how much I depend on her. Mondays were a little challenging (but my best friend, Char, stepped in to rescue me). And getting ready for a big party was challenging, especially when I didn’t have the queen event-planner (Shannon) on my team! Mom arrived home in the late afternoon on Friday—just in time to help us set up for the shower. (Russ spent a couple days being a single parent…)

I was exhausted by Sunday (and my house was a disaster), but I worked in the nursery at church in the morning and then we had a late night out with friends. Monday is our busiest day of the week with Classical Conversations, but it is tougher when we aren’t prepared and we’ve all had a little less sleep than we need. (And what a nasty, drenched, dark, blustery Monday it was!!)

So I slept in this morning. And then made a late breakfast of waffles and whipped cream. And then began the little by little process of putting the house back into some semblance of order (forget clean and lovely, I’ll settle for a few bare surfaces). Tackling the towers of dishes and dirty clothes. The bins and boxes of party stuff. The piles of papers. Bleh. And it is still nasty outside.

I’m in denial that Thanksgiving is in two days, kick-starting the blur through the holidays. I’m praying we find some time to sit and savor the season of advent.

Are you all ready for the Christmas season?

Even the darkest night will end

…and the sun will rise. ~Les Miserables

My Life = Laundry and Books

That pretty much sums up our new school year. Lola got sick right out of the gate, of course—back to back days in the nursery at church and at Classical Conversations did her in. The past couple of days I’ve felt more tired than I have in a very long time. Not sick, exactly, but fighting off being sick. I really just wanted to stay in bed all day long.

I have a gorgeous family to share with you—my last family photo session of the year. I think I have one senior session to go and then I’m done. Except for maternity and newborn sessions for my sister—it should go without saying! I don’t know when I’ll start scheduling again. This homeschooling gig is a full-time job with overtime!

Swim team practices started back up. Book club last week with CC moms discussing Night by Elie Wiesel. Book club tonight with my ChocLit Guild ladies discussing The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon.

Lola turns two on Monday. We are celebrating with family on Sunday, and I haven’t even begun to plan or prepare for her party. Bad mommy.

And that’s about it.

How has your September been?

Giveaway Winners!

Thank to all who entered the You Can Do It Too! giveaway. We have three winners!

Paris said… “I would love a copy of this! Thanks!

AppleGreen said… “Looks great!”

April said… “A copy of this would be fun to read. Thanks for the opportunity Heidi.”

If you are one of the winners, please email me (heidi(at)poetsgarden(dot)com) with your contact information!

Billboards

Do you ever feel like you are heading down life’s highway, and suddenly a billboard pops up that seems to be speaking directly to you? And then another one. And then another one. And at some point, you realize God has a big message he is trying to get through to you?

It all began with a trip to Virginia. I can pinpoint a specific moment: dinner with six incredible women. Susan finished her meal and then asked: ‘What is your next big thing?’  The conversation circled the table as each woman in turn told about her plans for the near or not-so-near future. I listened to plans of travel, and writing projects, and business ventures. And I thought to myself: This is the big thing. I’m going home to make PB&J sandwiches for the rest of my life.

I’m not talking about comparing myself with other women or feeling like I wasn’t worth something because I didn’t have big plans. I’m not even talking about whether someone should have plans or what they should be. Or what sacrifices one should (or should not) be willing to make for those plans. I’m talking about the fact that I use fear and excuses (lots and lots of excuses) to keep me from living a full life. A life full of possibility instead of restriction. I used to be a big dreamer-planner, but I allowed the daily grind of reality steal my dreams.

A billboard was staring me in the face. Big things are scary and hard, but they are still in the realm of possibility if you are willing to work toward them.

It had been a long time since I had read the blog Resolved 2 Worship. For some reason, I found myself reading pages and pages of archives recently.

The billboard read: What is your excuse, Heidi? You use four children as an excuse to not do anything or go anywhere. Because it is too much trouble, not enough fun. Well, it is time to step up and go on adventures. DO SOMETHING, even if it is complicated, and messy, and not every second of it is fun.

(Now, there are all sorts of other things to be learned at Resolved 2 Worship, but I felt as if God had that particular message for me at this particular time.)

So we went to the beach.

We went walking in Eugene.

Those were just warm-ups.

Then I felt called to an impromptu road trip to see my grandparents. In California. With the kids. Without Russ.

After we returned home, a friend posted a TED talk video on Facebook. I took the time to listen. To read that billboard.

The billboard read: You have to do something. Little things. But SOMETHING. Often.

And I made a list of little things (physical, mental, emotional, and social) that I could do during any hour of any day. But that kind of list doesn’t do anything, unless you do the things.

There was another kind of list I needed to create that was a form of action. It was the gratitude list I’d been thinking I should make ever since reading the remarkable book One Thousand Gifts. I needed to go through the action of writing down all the gifts God has given me, all day, every day.

I pulled out the journal Russ and the boys had given me for my birthday and thought it was just waiting for this purpose. I started my gratitude list.

Then a friend on Facebook (another point for social media) posted a picture with a quote. Yes, an inspirational quote. A dime a dozen. It got under my skin. Another billboard.

I had excuses. I’m not brave. I’m lazy and undisciplined. I can’t do it. But what is that thing? It has to have a point. I don’t want to do a thing just to say I’ve done a thing.

We went to a local Mexican restaurant. I placed our take-out order. Enchilada. Picadillo. Now, those words might not seem like much to you, but I’ve had proper Spanish pronunciation drilled into me from my infancy. It seems all wrong to say them with an English accent. So I tried to say them correctly, but nonchalantly. Because I’m insecure about doing or saying anything in front of someone else who does or says it well.

Then I get to fajitas. (It is much easier to say that with an English accent, because it is practically an English word, isn’t it? Like pizza.) Chicken. (That’s an easy one.) The (good-looking) guy smirked and said pollo. And then he asked if I wanted flour or corn tortillas. In Spanish. I turned to Russ and asked him if he wanted flour or corn tortillas. He said flour. I told the guy flour. He repeated flour in Spanish (with another smirk). I nodded. (I promise this story is going somewhere…)

See, here’s the deal. I can pronounce Spanish fairly well when I’m not feeling all self-conscious about it (which is never), but I don’t have a large Spanish vocabulary. I picked ‘corn’ out of his question and inferred based on context. But I couldn’t hear exactly what he said for ‘flour.’ Certainly not enough to repeat it. And I’m self-conscious as heck in situations like this. I should have just laughed, asked him to tell me the word for ‘flour’ again, and tried to repeat it. But instead I wanted to find a hole somewhere to hide in.

So Russ didn’t understand what was going on and thought the guy was questioning why he would want flour tortillas with his fajitas. And the guy said (with the smirk that was now permanent), ‘No, it is just that she was speaking so beautifully until she got to fajitas.’

It might come as a surprise to you all, with my life hanging out here in public like this, but I hate any sort of attention like this. I get embarrassed so. very. easily. It shouldn’t have been a big deal.

Billboard: Learn to speak Spanish fluently because I’ve always wanted to. And then be brave enough to do it.

I picked up the next book on my stack. Twelve other books on the stack have bookmarks a few pages in. The other 34 haven’t been cracked open. But book club was the following week. I should have at least a chapter under my belt before book club, no?

In two days I had finished A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller.

p. 31

I wanted it to be an easy story. But nobody really remembers easy stories. Characters have to face their greatest fears with courage. That’s what makes a good story.

p. 58

We get robbed of the glory of life because we aren’t capable of remembering how we got here. When you are born, you wake slowly to everything… The experience is so slow you could easily come to believe life isn’t that big of a deal, that life isn’t staggering. What I’m saying is I think life is staggering and we’re just used to it. We all are like spoiled children no longer impressed with the gifts we’re given—it’s just another sunset, just another rainstorm moving in over the mountain, just another child being born, just another funeral.

p. 59

I’ve wondered, though, if one of the reasons we fail to acknowledge the brilliance of life is because we don’t want the responsibility inherent in the acknowledgment. We don’t want to be characters in a story because characters have to move and breathe and face conflict with courage. And if life isn’t remarkable, then we don’t have to do any of that; we can be unwilling victims rather than grateful participants.

p. 68

If the point of life is the same as the point of a story, the point of life is character transformation… If the character doesn’t change, the story hasn’t happened yet.

p. 70

But I also wondered if… we were designed to live through something rather than to attain something, and the thing we were meant to live through was designed to change us.

p. 74

‘Beneath the surface of characterization,… regardless of appearances, who is this person? At the heart of his humanity, what will we find? Is he loving or cruel? Generous or selfish? Strong or weak? Truthful or a liar? Courageous or cowardly? The only way to know the truth is to witness him make choices under pressure, to take one action or another in the pursuit of his desire.”

p. 75

In the room where I’m writing today, nothing is happening. And later there will be laundry happening, which is nothing to daydream about. I can’t deal with reality.

p. 77

My entire life had been designed to make myself more comfortable, to insulate myself from the interruption of my daydreams.

p. 86

I believe there is a writer outside ourselves, plotting a better story for us, interacting with us, even, and whispering a better story into our consciousness.

p. 87

The real Voice is stiller and smaller and seems to know, without confusion, the difference between right and wrong and the subtle delineation between the beautiful and profane.

p. 100

A general rule in creating stories is that characters don’t want to change. They must be forced to change…

The rule exists in story because it’s a true thing about people. Humans are designed to seek comfort and order, and so if they have comfort and order, they tend to plant themselves, even if their comfort isn’t all that comfortable. And even if they secretly want for something better.

p. 186

I realized how much of our lives are spent trying to avoid conflict. Half the commercials on television are selling us something that will make life easier. Part of me wonders if our stories aren’t being stolen by the easy life.

p. 246

It’s interesting that in the Bible, in the book of Ecclesiastes, the only practical advice given about living a meaningful life is to find a job you like, enjoy your marriage, and obey God. It’s as though God is saying, Write a good story, take somebody with you, and let me help.

One gigantic billboard: Face your fears. Be grateful for this staggering life. Be willing to change. Don’t daydream as a way to escape your life. Listen to the Master Writer. Step outside your comfort zone. Work hard.

I thought again about the inspirational quote. Do the crazy thing… I wondered who wrote it. I googled Ciona Rouse. It turns out she wrote Like Breath and Water: Praying with Africa. It is about hope-filled prayer that keeps track of miracles instead of pains. About living a story filled with prayer as vital as breath and water and being intertwined in one another’s stories.

The billboard read: Add prayer to that list. To the top of the list. Because God writes a better story.

I went to Ciona’s page on Facebook. (Uh-huh.) She lists her favorite quotes.

"Hope is the thing with feathers that perches on the soul" -Emily Dickinson

It is the first one on her list. And the quote in my email signature. And one of my inspirations for Mt. Hope. (Well, that and doing hard things. I must have forgotten somewhere along the way.)

Her cover photo? It says: You are living your story.

I think I’m getting the message.

Live a good story and DO that thing.

• Pray (as if my life depended on it).
• Keep a written record of miracles and God-given gifts.
• Eat well and exercise hard.
• Seek adventure (even when it is messy and difficult. especially when it is messy and difficult).
• Learn Spanish fluently and be brave enough to speak it.
• Be open to finding a BIG thing and working toward it.

I’m still thinking about several ideas. I still have lots of questions. (Such as: How to decide if a thing is worth doing, and why. Whether everyone is meant to do epic things. How to do these things in the context of family. And how to create ‘inciting incidents.’) They might come up for discussion in future blog posts. I even created a category (Living a Good Story) for the occasion.

Will you join me in this journey?

“A good storyteller doesn’t just tell a better story, though. He invites other people into the story with him, giving them a better story too… Nobody gets to watch the parade.” ~Donald Miller

 

Listen to the story God is writing for you. And do it.

Care to Vote?

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A sweet blog reader directed my attention to the Circle of Mom Top 25 Homeschool Mom blog awards. (I’m on the Pending Approval list for a day.) If you are interested in checking out new (to you) homeschool blogs, head on over! And if you feel so led, maybe you can put in a vote for your favorite homeschooling blog. {hint, hint} You can vote once a day for the next 15 days!
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Guess what Lola is getting for Christmas.

A baby….

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Cousin!!!

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{Congratulations, Shannon and Ben!!}

Don’t they still look like newlyweds?
They’ve been together for almost 20 years and just celebrated their 15th wedding anniversary!

Feeling a Little Like This Today

(And now I’m in the mood to visit the coast again!)

Oh, yes. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hugh Jackman. Russell Crowe. You’ve got to be kidding me.

A Letter to My Readers

Okay, it is Emily’s letter to her readers at Chatting at the Sky, but I wanted to share the link with you because it is so beautiful and true.

Dear Blog Reader Who Has Never Commented

Doing It All

As I’m cleaning my house today (I’m using that phrase lightly) getting ready for book club this evening, my mind is racing. One theme of my thoughts is "What does having it all look like?” Or, more specifically, “What constitutes doing it all?”

We spend so much time as mothers, and particularly as homeschooling mothers, comparing ourselves to others. And often finding ourselves ‘falling short’ according to what we perceive others as having or doing or being or accomplishing.

So I’m curious. What would you list as the things someone would have to do to do it all? And do you know anyone who (from the outside) seems to accomplish all those things?

If there is one thing that I took away from this past weekend, it is that we are all human. No one has or does it all. Everyone has fears and insecurities. We all sacrifice something for our priorities. And whether or not we think we have it all together, we never have complete control over our lives or the people in them.